Staying centered during the holiday season
Deep into the Holiday season, we are approaching Christmas which usually means the most family time of them all. That’s a beautiful thing and the holidays are so special since we get to spend quality time with family and friends you may not see regularly. But, no matter who you are, I’m sure there’s at least one thing that makes you a little anxious about it all. Whether it’s seeing that one uncle who you really can’t stand or a being out of your routine or family conflict of any sort - everyone has their thing(s). I always look forward to being around family, but it definitely requires mental preparation in the weeks leading up to the family functions.
This year, I am feeling more equipped than ever before so I want to share a few things I’m doing to keep myself grounded during this Holiday season:
Stick to my small non-negotiable practices: Since we can be so busy around this time, it’s easy to lose the go-to practices that keep us centered. For me, that’s meditation and movement. The first thing I do after sitting up in bed is pause for a meditation, even if that means it’s just 2 minutes of breathing. The key is realizing that even if you’re used to 20 minutes a day, 2 minutes is still valuable and the effects will still be felt. That goes for movement too. If you’re used to a sweaty gym workout, a brief walk can also have the same effects. The point of these little things in the first place is to help you move through the rest of your life as the best version of yourself - not the practice itself. So even if it differs from the norm, create space for those things before diving into all the festivities.
2. Taking me time: I’m one of those people who reallllly needs her alone time. I love being around people but I need that me time to recharge or I end up being a little bitchy lol (self-awareness is the first step right?). The me time starts with those first few minutes of breathing and meditation in the morning. But sometimes in the midst of days of staying with family, I need a little more. Getting outside for a walk to clear my mind, using my self-care time in the evening as intentional me time, or even just excusing myself to the bathroom for a minute to regroup. Never feel bad for taking that time for yourself.
3. Making a conscious effort to let go of the annoyances: This one. Often family can trigger you more than anyone else. My family knows just the right things to say to really set me off like no one else lol. I think the biggest shift I’ve noticed from doing the consistent work on myself, is even just the awareness of the choice in that moment to keep my mouth shut. It’s not every time that I can just ignore it and let it go right away but I’m definitely working on it and notice that when I’m able to keep my mouth closed and not feed into it, it saves us from unnecessary fights. It is important to not just let every little thing go if it’s really something that needs to be talked out. But I think there’s also a much better time and place than the dinner table on Christmas. Giving yourself and the other person time can also help diffuse the situation naturally so you can speak about it later on in a mature, calm way.
4. Release expectations of others: We can go into interactions with others with the attitude of, “He better not do this” or “She’s going to piss me off when she brings that up”. That already sets you up for failure since you’ll be triggered as soon as it happens or you’ll just be waiting for it to come up. If we can release the expectations we have of others to show up how we expect them to, we make room for them to surprise us. If they don’t then oh well, that’s on them and we can just move on and choose not to entertain it. But if they do, you saved yourself all the trouble of expecting it and got to have a positive experience where you could easily have ruined it by expecting the negative in the first place.
5. Allow yourself to indulge and release guilt: Christmas is the cookie and treat holiday of the year in my books. Being with family often means you’re eating things you usually don’t. I think it’s so important not to dwell on being out of your routine and live in the moment of the connection sharing meals and baking treats with family brings. Remember, food is not just one thing. While yes, we want to nourish our bodies, food is also meant to be enjoyed. More important than what you’re eating is the soul-nourishing experience of being around loved ones. Don’t dwell on indulging. Your routine and nourishing foods will be there for you when you get back to your norm.
I hope these little tips help bring more presence and joy this Holiday season. I’ll be working on all of them right along with you.
Happy Holidays!
